Jokes about peoples

Read funny Jokes about Georgians

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Two talk gruzina:
-Listen, you remember Givi?
-Of course! Paralich Givi
-knocked: all left the party, at first a hand, a stalemate is nude,
patom...
-A as man's advantage? He it managed to throw
-A!

*****

Two talk gruzina.
-Slyushay, ti slishat, okazivatsya on Marx there is a life!
-of Waugh-pervikh, not on Marx, and on Mars. And in-vtorikh, it only a hypotenuse!

*****

Two talk gruzina:
-Slyush, daragy, I am newer a way a ram yesterday to cut pridumal.
-Well and how?
-of Ania ne object.

*****

The Georgian cat and the cat-odessit.
kot-Georgian talk: "Meow, huh? "
KOT-Odessa: "Meow!"

*****

The Raspostranenny surname of Lomidze in Georgia has the word in the root "Ache" that is translated into Russian as "Lev
". The action takes place in a small town where only one man with a surname Lomidze lives. The lady comes to
zhenskuyu consultation apropos beremennosti.
-Who the child's father? - Mister Lomidze asks vrach.
-answers dama.
na the next day other woman with the similar diagnosis comes and calls the father of the child besides of Lomidze's
gospodina. For the third day the situation repeats, but the woman as you already understood, again the new … In day of
chetverty the woman comes and the Doctor addresses to vrachu:
-, help, very much I want to have the child, but I cannot become pregnant in any way!
doktor investigates "patient" and speaks:
- At you everything is all right. Bring yours muzha.
privodit. The big beautiful Georgian with a surname Lomidze appears the husband. The doctor asks the wife vyyti.
-Listen, Lomidze's long loaf, how so?
-E-e-e, darling, Lomidze in bondage ne breeds!

*****

Flight Moscow-Tbilisi. The Georgian approaches the pilot, puts to visku
pistolet:
-Give Tbilisi!
-So at us and so the flight "Moscow-Tbilisi". Give to
-Tbilisi, I speak!
-But we fly to Tbilisi! That told
-Ya to you? Give Tbilisi, and that the third time I fly to Tbilisi, a
prizemlyayus in Istanbul!

*****

Two swear gruzina:
-I you el.
- And I you two times el.
-I 3 times el.
-Slyushchay, small millet know?
-Znayu.
-you ate Two bags!

*****

Two gruzin:
-You pidaras swear!
-A you twice pidaras!
-A you three times pidaras!
-A you, and you, and you at all not pidaras!
-That - about - oh, it I not pidaras?!

*****

The Russian banya.
paryatsya 3 Georgians in Gogi's bath, Givi and Posmatrite's Zurab.
gogi:
-on May a tattoo a class yes .
vse such yes super.
givi:
- And at me look too cool at mountains and mountain orel.
vse super - the her klas.
zurab:
-gets lays down on a table and speaks look kay at a tattoo at me that such looking and there tochka.
-cho for a point it unless tatu.
zurab:
shchas a razdracha look at what beautiful city of Dbilisi.

*****

The Russian man arrived to Georgia. Left from gostinitsy
progulyatsya, towards to it gruzin:
-ne the courses, razdevayut there There in the evening!
muzhik was developed in another storonu.
- There too ne the courses, there too razdevayut!
-Where to me to go? - is surprised muzhik.
-ne the courses, zdes razdevaysa Anywhere!

*****

The Russian tourist goes on the Georgian small streets, studies architecture i
vdrug wild local natives and Bach fly up... raped. The man, yasnoye
delo runs on the brisk, populous street, finds standing on postu
menta and zhaluyetsya:
-Companion militiaman, me on that street raped!
-Ha! So you our street walk... handsome!

*****

Sakartvelo
spektakl the Georgian theater about 1917
dzerzhinsky: "Vladymyr Ylych, Auroras went off with a bang! "
lenin: "VAKH-VAKH-VAKH revolution!"

*****

The man from a zone ran away somehow. Runs the village. Asks to shelter. The Georgian appeared the owner. Muzhik:
-Hear, cover me poka.
-Daragoy, I tebya will cover, only I tebya will be ymt three times a day in ж$пу.
Мужику a reluctance that it was found, soglasilsya.
prokhodit some time. The man begged, cannot any more and speaks:
-Hear, give I you though one day of по$бу.
Грузин takes off trousers, bends down and raaadostno so vosklitsayet:
- And what zh ti so long molchal, daragy?

*****

- Light, slyushay, you with prezervatyvy or without?
-is better with a condom...
gruzin puts on a condom, and the head - protivogaz.
- And it what for???
-of Ne I love a smell of a garely rezyna...

*****

- You are my wife in the morning budish?
- Yes. I will.

*****

The Georgian on a high tree sits and reads the book. Other Georgian and speaks:
-approaches it And you why on a dereva read!
Ha that the first to it otvechayet:
-I simply want to graduate from the higher school!

*****

Two Georgians and beseduyut:
-Predstav sit, genatsvat that you went in les and on tebya the bear attacked! What ti you will do? I Will take
- The gun and I will shoot it!
-A Nat of the gun? I Will take
-a dagger and I will kill!
-A Nat of a dagger? I Will take
-a stone and I will throw!
-A Nat of a stone?
- Then I will run! The bear catches up with
-A?
-A I then on derevo will get!
-A Nat Dereva?
-As Nat Dereva?! I in a lesa!!
-A les such that Nat Dereva!...
-Vakh, slyushay, Gogi, you are whose friend, mine or it medvedya???!!!

*****

Two Georgians sit, eat a shish kebab, drink wine. One drugomu:
-Gogi, what you would do if in the wood the bear attacked you?
-would Kill ego.
- And Nat of a dagger?
-Vakh! What for the Dzhigit without dagger?
-Well Nat of a dagger and vse.
-Well... then on a tree zalez.
- And Nat dereva.
-Hey! What for les such, a tree Nat? Nat of a tree and vse.
-Listen to
-, to the genatsvala, you for whom, for menya, or for a bear?!

*****

Two crows on a tree sit. Suddenly Chyryk flies up to them such simpatichnyy
vorobey with a large curved beak and in a cap and zayavlyaet:
- And!

*****

- Tell hleb.
-Hleb.
-More softly!
-Hlep!
-Is even softer!
-of Bulichk, bulichka!

*****

- Listen, derevo you see? I want to be photographed, - the Georgian fotografu.
-Please speaks. And how you wanted - on a tree, under it or near?
-Behind a tree!
-??!
-Ya I will send a card to mother. She will look and will tell: "Vakh-Vakh, and

*****

- Listen, daragy! Ti why a ram in the plane you drag?
-of Aaa... This ne ram, this bribe. And the ram at institute studies.

*****

- Slyushay, Givi, I got acquainted with such deushka here - abaldet! Buttocks - simply a peach... Natasha zovout.
-Well and something paluchilos?
-Still as: I tr@khnut her husband yesterday!

*****

- Slyush, Gogi, at us from yesterday "Mukuzani" did not remain?
-HET.
-A "Tsinandali"?
-HET.
-A of wons in that butilka?
-mi nassat It.
-Well pour "Minassali"...

*****

- Slyushchay, Vano, you such a birdie know the small, what so krasivo
poyet? Yes I know
-, I know. The nightingale is called!
-Vakh-Vakh! Precisely! There are I, so by the field, look this nightingale,
tfu! May millet kyushchat. I to it: you ki

*****

The Georgian watches the TIME program (when it was)...
-B of Georgia are raised food prices...
- Ate and is I will be...
-B of Georgia are raised fuel prices...
-Went and I will go...
-is solar Everywhere - in Georgia rains...
-Here...! That want - that and do!

*****

The Georgian film about war heroes is shot. Mountain reka.
iz this mountain the reka appears enemy nemetsky underwater the boat. From it there is an enemy nemetsky general and
dostayet enemy nemetskiya padzorny a pipe and looks in nee.
a at this time the national hero grandfather Bovo leans out of bushes. It gets the carbine and strelat directly in Vi's
trubu.
-! Who strelnut it?!!
-It I, grandfather Bovo!
- Then we give up....

*****

- The Tsar of the Georgian, the Jew and Russian collects and gives prikaz:
-If you are able to drink a vodka box, to break off a dragon and to caress the woman - I will send the daughter and half-kingdoms to
pridachu. But will not be able - the head

*****

Performance at the Georgian theater about Red shapochku.
- The Grandmother, the grandmother, why at tebe such balshy ears?
-That Lush is heard, the darling of May!
- The Grandmother, the grandmother, why at tebe such balshy eyes?
-That Lush videt, darling of May!
- The Grandmother, the grandmother, why at tebe such balshy a nose?
-Hey ti on the pasmatr yes!

*****

The teacher at a mathematics lesson at Gogi:
-Gogi asks, and the sum of squares of a leg is equal to a chem?
-to a hypotenuse Square!
-A chem dokazhish? Mother I swear to
-!

*****

The elderly Georgian climbs down mountains, decided to walk, look in the city that there and as. Goes to itself, and here to it the young Georgian and speaks:
-Deng give
podbegayet and!
starik looked at it and asks:
-Chto, at tebya too is not present??

*****

Two sleep in one bed gruzina:
-Gogi, ti spysh? That does your her do
-Splyu.
-A in my ass?
-of Nychego, nychy, now vitashchu.
-I tebe to a vitashch!!!! Give Spa!!!

*****

The old Georgian comes in the land in the plane and drags with himself a ram. The pilot asks:
-Ty that, went crazy? Why in the plane of a ram to drag?
Da unless is a ram, it - magarych. The ram at me at university studies.

*****

The Georgian is situated on the bank of the river, and is engaged in an onanism. Another approaches and asks:vakhtang you that do? How
chto? children I heat....

*****

There is a Georgian near break and cries. Podezzhayet to it another gruzin:
-Wai, Gogi, darling, why you cry? Look at
- There - and points a finger in break, and there you will buy the Mercedes broken in chips lezhit.
-"E new, be not upset".
-"Look at Forward Sitting" - and there the girl lies foot hands otdelno.
-Vakh, not a problem, new zavedesh.
-Look that at it in rtu.
- At Vi, Gogi's crying, crying.

*****

There is a Georgian on the mountain, all in bruises... blood from a nose, and in a hand a boomerang derzhit.
k suits it vtoroy:
-What is it?
-of Ne I know...
-Why it? I know
-of Ne...
-Well so vikin!
-On, itself vikin and!!!

*****

There is a Georgian, trades in pies. Another approaches gruzin:
-Daragoy, pie with whom?
-Vakh, ti that you do not see that is written: "PIES WITHOUT ANYBODY"?!

*****

There is in Tbilisi a man, the little boy runs up to it and speaks:
-Vano asked to transfer, that you to it on cellular telefonu
pozvonili.
-Thanks, a pager-dzhan.

*****

The passionate southerner brings the girl to the room. Razdevayet.
-My God, what you thin! You in general can go on takikh
spichkakh?
-I Can...
- Then go, go from here.