Jokes about the characters

Read funny Jokes about Harry Potter

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Hokku (Japanese tercet):
Bcex filled up snegg.
na perfectly one Malfoy handed over ekzamen
lish.

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Bury Snape. Conversation before Grobom:
sirius:-Tfu-tfu-tfu! That not ozhil:
dambldor-Ty then and on on a tree still POSTUCHI:
SIRIUS KNOCKS ON GROBU:-Tuk-tuk-tuk:
sneyp (with irritation):-Kto there?

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It is good to be animagy - will call a dog, and you grin only enough...

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- It is good to have a lodge in the village! - Harry Potter told pulling out the Curl from a cow flat cake...

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Well greased handrail will help your companions not to be late from other faculty for a lesson. And correctly hammered nail - not to slip by the necessary floor.

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The whole year Slytherin's pupil Vincent Krebb showed to professors a middle finger. Draco Malfoy appeared the sponsor of display.

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Fourth part. Mr. Ollivander checks sticks uchastnikov.
-So... the oak... the ashen... saksaulovy... the crab... The CRAB?!
makgonagall grabs ears of Dobbi:
-How many times for you to speak, not to offer bribes to Ollivander!

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Zhou and Harry in a bed have a rest ONA:
-Know, to me it is so good! I want that so was vsegda.
-Yes, and I tozhe.
-seem to me, we should reflect on somehow to connect our relations stronger bonds... Harry vostorgenno:
-Yes, darling?! Zhou, the ambassador pauzy:
-Give with you we will be photographed!!!

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Whatever modern children's writers wrote - at them all the same Garri
potter turns out.

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There was somehow time Harry Potter on the Forbidden wood and saw the centaur who fell in a hole. Harry could not get a centaur, but a hole dug that other centaurs did not get to it.

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There was on the wood Hagrid. Suddenly to it towards - a huge boar. Well, Hagrid did not become puzzled also women in him from both trunks. In total around in a smoke, a horse-radish it is not visible, and Hagrid costs and thinks: "I got or did not get?" The smoke dissipates... he sees - there is a boar: "Well, the man, you got!"

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Wide bed. Harry wakes up, pushes the Sigarette lying a number of Germionu:
-will not report?
potom pushes Rona:
-lying on the other hand the Lighter throw!
GDE in feet leans out Draco, all of them together prikurivayut.
zatyanuvshis and having let out a smoke, Draco speaks:
-Eh, the father would know that I smoke - would kill!

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Examination on zelyevareniyu.
sneyp, was tired: That, Mr. Potter. Eventually, it is possible not the nobility Alkhimii and to be good chelovekom.
garri, it is gloomy: And vice versa...

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Examination in studying of magl. Professor checks works of pupils. Guard! Someone gained 20 points! In Hogvarts the most real broke through magl! Ah, excuse, Ms. Granger, it you …

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The guide at visit by tourists of a cave speaks:
-This cave arose thanks to one Scot of
-Seamus Finnigan who complained to the relatives that incidentally dropped in a fox hole a galleon.

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Epitaph lovtsa:
lechu I - a wind in hair,
I on glazakh.
ya see happiness tears snitch, but here, alas, me the bladzher demolished the half-heads …

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I do not intend to spoil the relations neither with heavens, nor with a hell, - I have friends both in that, and in other district. - Severus Sneyp

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- I with you speak two hours, and all of you time yawn!
garri Potter:
-Ya did not yawn. I tried to squeeze the word

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Godzilla - a Japanese legend of the first visit of Chuck Norris to Tokyo.

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- And if to cook Chuck Norris's eggs, he will become even more abruptly? - Its eggs do not cook.

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Chuck Norris's beard so sharp that to it he slices paper therefore anybody never hits him into the head.

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In the childhood Chuck Norris dreamed to become Chuck Norris.

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In honor of Chuck Norris in all McDonald's in Texas give the biggest sandwiches. Simply order "Big Chak".

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The Great Wall was constructed for protection against Chuck Norris, but the invention shamefully failed.

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Camels have a hump because Chuck Norris needs a place to store its weapon.

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Instead of what to be born as the ordinary child, Chuck Norris decided to open the way from mother's womb a fist.

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The military unit Chuck Norris is not present at game "A civilization 4 ? because one unit "Chuck Norris" will destroy all nations together for one course.

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Contrary to the standard opinion, in America not democracy, and Chaktatura.

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Time and tide wait for no man. Unless Chuck Norris.

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Chuck Norris's diploma is so abrupt that does not demand protection.

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The only thing which can threaten Chuck Norris, is Chuck Norris.

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The only thing which Chuck Norris is afraid is Chuck Norris.

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The only thing capable to cut Chuck Norris is Chuck Norris.

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If you see Chuck Norris, he sees you. If you do not see Chuck Norris, perhaps, you needed to live only some seconds.

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If in Mongolia to say a name of Chuck Norris, people will start hitting you into his honor feet from a turn. After that you will be overtaken by the REAL kick from a turn performed by Chuck.

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If you ask Chuck Norris: "what time is it now", he will always answer: "two more seconds". After you ask "two seconds to what?", he will kick you from a turn in a face.

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If Chuck Norris married Ksenia Sobchak and took her surname - there would be Chuck Sobchak...

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If Chuck Norris has sex with the man, it does not mean that he is a gay. It simply means that women temporarily came to an end.

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It is a little more, and Putin will become more abruptly than Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris does not trust in it.