Jokes about women

Read funny Jokes about brunettes

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- I am the wife of Mr. of GREYA
-I Mr. Gray's wife, - the brunette speaks, getting acquainted on reception with horoshenkoy
blondinkoy.
-Oh, as it is pleasant, and I sekretarsha.
-you want to tell it, the former secretary, isn't it? - expressively

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Obviously upset blonde with a sad look gives to the brunette money. Brunette: "Sorry, the girlfriend, I cannot take from you money. The matter is that I watched this story in five-hour news and knew that it will jump off". - "Anything, the sister, take. Everything is honest. I too watched news at five o'clock, but did not think that it once again will be solved on it!"

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53% of women aged between 16 and 29 at least once in day think about with @@ se. Opposite to the man of at least 53% of day think about with @@ se with the woman from 16 to 29.

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Ha a ladies' bedside table lie banana and included vibpatop
banan you ask ~ well that drozhish? First time perhaps? ~

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Beach the girl whispers Ha parnyu:
-to Darling I madly love you! You me too?
paren in otvet:
- And you too!

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Night. Stuchatsa to the female hostel. The door opens vakhtep.
- And it is possible for Tan ((-speaks entered (the small explanation for tankmen))
vakhtep - Yes at us here, in general - that, all is possible........

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And I tenderly call the: hare washing, a small fish washing, a birdie moya.
- And it that? She ears will spread wide
-A, will goggle, and a beak clicks.

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Alyosha, you love me?
-pointed, Vasilisushka!
-A for the sake of me yolochku
slomayesh? I
Will break!
-A birch? A birch I will break
-I, lyubov
moya!
-A I will take a nap?
-A you will take a nap all les
perelomayu na @@!!!

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Drugstore. The girl buys the test for pregnancy. The druggist asks:
-to you for 15 rubles or for 5?
-is not important, if only negative!

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Two girls who are going to leave zahusband .
-talk As you think, what girls found in men interesting i
privlekatelnogo earlier?
- When earlier?
-Well when did not invent money yet, was not cars?

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- More blondes are pleasant to you or brunettes?
-of a boob are pleasant to me.
- And hair color? I do not love
-Ya, when on boobs hair!

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- It would be fine if you now appeared naked in my bed …
-of THAT???
-B sense "Hi! How are you doing?". This devil's T9...)

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In avtobuse:
-Girl, you probably, stripper?
-Yes, and how you guessed? You a foot hold
-A a hand-rail.

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In apteke:
-You're welcome.
-a bag to give 20 packs of condoms?
-it, it at me beautiful.

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In aske.
- And you as call?
-Nyurgustan.
-It you shcha the head hit Klava, or such name is real is?

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In fur magazine:
-Sorry, that all money wet! My husband so strongly sobbed when gave them to me.

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In park, the guy with devushkoy:
-Sasha, remove points, you will tear to me stockings!
through a little minut:
-Sasha, put on glasses, you kiss a bench!!

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In park at night on a bench the embraced lovers admire full lunoy.
ona languidly vzdykhayet:
-Darling, and you could love me how Dante loved Beatrice?
ON is silent. It snova:
- And you could love me how Petrark loved Laura?
ON again is silent. ONA:
-Darling, and could love you me how Romeo loved Juliette? Not vyderzhivayet:
-Listen to
ON, I only read "Kashtanka" - want, for an ass I will bite?

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In park on a bench the old man, and opposite to it two little girls sits, well in very much short yubkakh.
ded looked-looked at all this, then, sighing, says:
-Well, presently it could be washed, but not to air!

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In the crowded bus becomes hollow pyaniyshy (M) uzhik.
v the bus of an enshin to it speaks:-M you are drunk, you are simply disgustingly drunk, simply disgustingly drunk...
M otvechayet:-A at you the girl of a foot curve, well the simply very curve...
A I sober will be tomorrow

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In the train which leaves from the southern resort, the girl hardly manages to sit down. When she reaches the place and sits down, starts stroking the knees and speaks: At last you together!

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The seed of the man contains millions of spermatozoa. And I also mean them when govoryu
girl that for the sake of it is ready to leave millions.

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The man in dirt rolls. By there passes a woman. Man speaks:
- The pig!
-But I to you nothing govorila.
-But thought, the stinker!

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- Vas! And you to me looked after somebody?
-B to the village behind cattle!

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– What it is your brother ceased to visit us? - the room hostess very young kvartirantku.
-Probably asks found to itself other sister...

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Evening. On a zavalinka the couple sits. He smokes a papiroska. She gnaws sunflower seeds. Silence. There passes an hour of
ONA:
-Well, I type will go?
ON:
-Sidi
prokhodit of an hour more of
ONA:
-Well, I type will go?
ON:
-Sidi.
prokhodit of an hour more of
ONA silently rises and leaves. It (extinguishing a papiroska):
-of Hm... Did not give.

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Evening. 23. 30. Conversation of mother and docheri:
-Well, Lena how appointment passed?
-is excellent!
- When at me was excellent, I came back at daybreak...

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– In How many the decent girl goes to bed?
-B eight Because in ten it should be at home.

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One dinosaur with passion to fine young dinozavrikhe blazed and I suggested it to be engaged with him natural prehistoric pazvlecheniyem.
ho dinozavrikha otvetila:
-still the small... Come when to me eighteen million years are executed!: (
ppigopyunilsya the dinosaur, but nevertheless patiently waited for it momenta.
ho when he in a rush of passion rushed to it, she did not want to indulge with it fatal stpasti.
-As so again? - the dumbfounded dinosaur exclaimed. - After all I patiently waited for yours a vosemnadtsatimillionoletiya! the 8E
-Foolish... At me the thousand only began... :)

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Here some more very short jokes about krasavy, but silly girls.

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- All men - pigs! - one girlfriend drugoy.
-Yes told? Then why you only also think of them?
-I very much love animals.

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Two friends (1)(2).
(1) - Well how are you doing?
(2) - Yes anything met. Here at last found the girl. I think on it zhenitsya.
(1) - You, a pancake, do not marry, you will not check yet - the girl it or not! 80
(2) - And how it? - And you make
(1) so: at first buy Champagne there, chocolate, still something, invite her to yourself. Pour wine, include a music, will drink and - fill up it sharply on a sofa! And if becomes puzzled, the girl, and is not present - so precisely шл$ %xa.
(2) - All right, poppobuyu.
vstpechayutsya through nedelyu.
(1) - Well as?!
(2) - the Pancake, I marry! Precisely, girl! I all as you ordered made. And when filled up!
OY, it so became puzzled!, so became puzzled!, what even enclosed a pillow not under the head, and under ж$ %u.

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Two girls meet one another govopit:
-Present to me in the bus gave way at once two young man.
-today And you were located?

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Meets (M) uzhik (D) an evushka and pridlogat it we will go perespim
(D) I am sick spidom
(M) well and chto
through hour dialogue in posteli
(D) you know I you deceived, I am not sick spidom
(M) is already sick :-)

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Meets two podrugi.
-As your guy? Still goes in for mathematics? I do not want to hear
-about it more! Yesterday called it, and he told that will not go for a walk because strikes with three unknown.

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Two girlfriends - rich and bednaya.
bogataya hvastayet:
-meet And to me the husband just made a new breast, a face lifting and areas dekolte.
bednaya:
- And me... and me the husband too made recently tightening a century in area yagodits.
-In sense?
-B sense of eyes on an ass pulled.

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- Yesterday it was gained courage and kissed Yulku
- And it to me: "and what it would mean? "And I take
- And blurt out about the silly woman: "Request for authorization"
-told that on Saturday would come to log in to it...

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- Yesterday got acquainted with parents of the girl!
-Well, and how?
-Accepted, as native son. The father even a belt gave!

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– Yesterday made the girl the proposal. it on the seventh month With happiness.